Joel and Zion get baptized!

January 8, 2022, was a Great To Be 8 day for these two boys.  Zion would have been baptized earlier, but then the family got sick, so it needed to be put off...and then it was time for Joel to be baptized, so they made it easy and did it together!  And that's kind of nice since they are pretty close cousins.  Zion lives in Cedar and Joel in Enoch.  Their dads did the baptizing and the confirming.  We had a big crowd since we had the Lillywhites, the Randalls, the Weavers and the Sheffields there to support the boys.  It was a really nice baptism.  The siblings helped out with the music.  Sweet Sarai led the music, Ellie, Eden and Noah played a trio of I am a Child of God on piano, viola and cello!  Bro. Randall and Paul gave nice baptism and Holy Ghost talks.  Ellie and Brady were Joel's witnesses and Dorothy and Juge were Zion's witnesses.  Juge gave the opening prayer at Joel's request and I gave the closing prayer at Zion's.  Lou and Juge planned and executed a wonderfully tasty lunch afterwards (the baptism was at 11 am). We had many kinds of delicious soup, Great To Be 8 pretzels, rolls, salads and desserts aplenty.  It was all very tasty!  It was nice to relax and visit.  We missed Supe and Beacher because they were out of town and the Smiths got sick at the last minute and couldn't come.  But we had everyone else.  Jay and Brynn came down and we got to have them stay with us.  

Dutchman's Draw and cancer update!

 Friday morning, January 14th, should go down in my history as being one of the BEST DAY'S EVER!  It was my follow-up appointment for my PET scan following my 6th and final chemo of this series of Bendamustine/Rituxin and Eudynica shots. I started this series in July 2021 and did a once a month Thursday/Friday chemo at the Cancer Center and then got the Eudynica shot on Saturday mornings at the hospital infusion center.  The first one was pretty bad, 2nd, 3rd and 4th not as bad.  The 5th one I had a cold to go with it and lots of other stress going on besides and it was the worst in some ways and the 6th was hard because of the cumulative effects, but good because it was last!  Overall, it wasn't too bad compared to what I see other people going through.  I had some nausea, but it was pretty well controlled by the meds for it.  I didn't lose my hair.  I was tired, depressed, maybe some chemo brain not being able to concentrate, and sometimes it was hard to eat or nothing tasted very good. And I was very tired. The worst part was the constipation caused by other drugs for nausea, allergic reactions, etc.  I didn't have allergic reactions either.  So, really, I can't complain and don't feel like I really had the terrible experience that most people seem to have, but I'm still very glad it's over with!  And I'm very thankful!!!  After the PET scan I read the on-line report and was pretty bummed when I read that there was still some cancer going on.  The above the diaphragm stuff was zapped gone by the chemo, but there was still some activity below the diaphragm.  And that made me think I'd be doing more full chemo or at least some maintenance with Rituxin.  Paul went with me to the appointment and I let the doctor know I'd read the written report.  He said we should just take a look at the scans.  And it was so amazing to see the before and after scans.  The before scan was really covered in active cancer areas!  It was actually pretty scary to see how much there was.  And then the after scan had just this tiny bit!  So he said I didn't have to do any more chemo now!!! He said this was great and just what they wanted to have happen and that I can go back to the watch and wait status.  He said maintenance was kind of a yes/no option since they don't have really great data to show how effective/helpful it really is.  He said I could have a remission of who knows how long.  So I will just go in every 3 months now and have a CT scan at 6 to see how things are going and try to just keep track of how I'm feeling.  (I kind of worry about that since I didn't really feel bad before because it just kind of crept up on me slowly without me noticing.) So, it's not a NED (no evidence of disease) outcome, but it is the next best thing and I am so thankful and relieved at this point!  

We just kind of went around feeling elated that day and taking it easy.  We didn't really do anything to celebrate too much.  Tried to take G'ma to lunch, but she wasn't up to it.  We just relaxed and enjoyed the day together. Then on Saturday we went out and hiked an old favorite - Dutchman's Draw!  It was a perfect winter hike in the desert.  It is such an amazing place.  Then we relaxed for the afternoon and had G'ma come and eat our Ham and Bean soup for dinner.  

Ziplining at Moe's Valley!

 Supe called the other day just as I was on my way to work and invited us to go ziplining at Moe's Valley with him, Leo and Dash and Beacher and Jem.  At first I thought I should say no and just stay at my first day back at work a long day.  But then I thought again and had Paul call back.  I took off work about 20 minutes early to have a maybe once in a lifetime free zipline ride with some of my favorite people!  And it was great!  I'm always pretty scared on high exposed places, but once I was on the rope and on my way, it was fine and so fun!  Glad I thought again and said yes to a grand adventure!  And so thankful that Supe and Leo did all the work to put together such a fun thing for us...and for free!  (Dash is probably 7 and he went first...brave kid!

Kolob Fingers, Cave Valley and our own Red Hill...in winter!

 Last week we finally found a day after the holiday break...to take our own break.  Paul's back was finally feeling good enough to take a ride to see the snow.  We went up to Kolob Fingers and it was beautiful and very uncrowded.  Then we drove over to Cave Valley and it was beautiful dressed in snow too.  And in the last week or so I have also enjoyed walks on the Red Hill while Paul was out of town.  So much beauty all around us to enjoy!  It felt so good to get out!

Koen gets ordained a teacher!

 I was happy that I could go and be there when Koen got ordained a Teacher! It was nice that Gaige got to stand in on the circle too since he's a Priest.  Too bad Paul was out of town still working on Jay and Brynn's fireplace, but it couldn't be helped.  Koen is growing up into such an amazing, nice and handsome young man.  Times are hard for him and the other kids right now with their mom and dad's divorce in the works.  I hope Koen and all of the kids can stay strong amid the many struggles that this is bringing to all of them.  I'm pretty sure Zade and Noah will be getting ordained too, but I didn't hear about it.  

Happy? New Year 2022

My Christmas holiday and New Year's Eve/Day and day have been very different this year.  Paul and Bean left before I got out of school for Christmas break to go up and build Jay and Brynn's fireplace in their new house in West Jordan.  They came home on Tuesday and were here for our family Christmas "Adam" party on Wednesday and for Christmas and some doctor appointments that Paul had and then went back up on Wednesday, the 28th and took Brady with them.  Today - New Year's Day - they finished and will clean up on Monday and come home to stay...thank goodness!  

New Year's Eve Anna Lou fell down coming back to her house from getting the mail.  She fell on her face on the cement sidewalk on her porch and really got a banged up face.  But, thankfully, she was able to make it into the house, call Ferf and Ferf called me.  We decided she needed to go in and I took her to the ER where we waited and waited and then she got seen, got a CAT scan and thank goodness had no broken bones. They gave her a pain pill, she barfed and I cleaned up what we couldn't catch in a paper cup that was handy.  They kind of just left her to me to take care of since they were really busy.  But eventually she got to go home.  Then she realized that she had hurt her hand/wrist in the fall, but was too tired and groggy to go back.  So today I took her and spent the whole afternoon in the ER and again, thankfully, nothing was broken.  They took much better care of her today.  Not so busy I guess.  So, this morning I got all the bills for the business and home paid along with some other chores.  And this afternoon I was at the ER.  I'm glad I could help and I think maybe now she will consent to get a rescue alert device and maybe even wear it so if she falls again, she will have something that will get help for her if she can't make her way to a phone.   

It has been a hard few months with Paul having some severe back pain - so severe he could barely stand to ride in the car, sit down, do much of anything.  After going through a long process he has been able to get some treatments in his back - nerve ablation - they basically kill the nerves that are causing the pain, and that has been a huge help.  I thought he was going to be laid up forever.  Of course the arthritis is still there destroying his back, but down the road he will have to get surgery to "fix" thatand his foot.  For now though, he is nearly pain free.  

Christmas is always a hard time for me.  I basically have to do it all.  Paul earns the money, I spend it trying to do what mom's do - please everyone - on a budget.  That is a lot of people to try to please in this family.  In the middle of that I was finishing up my last 2 chemo treatments which happened to be a week before Thanksgiving and a week before Christmas.  So I wasn't feeling my best self for either holiday, but at least I had a little recovery time during that week.  And in the middle of that they decided they would call me to be a Gospel Doctrine teacher.  That, to me, is a nightmare calling.  I have done so many callings that no one else wanted...Cub Scouts for years!  I loved serving in the YSA.  But I had to have a subs 3 times while I was recovering from Chemo for the Gospel Doctrine thing.  I only taught once and it actually went well, but the next time when I could have taught I was having a terrible time after chemo since I had chemo and a terrible cold that I picked up at school.  I was trying so hard to study, but just couldn't concentrate at all.  I just couldn't get it to come together and got more and more stressed.  And I just couldn't get away from it.  Anytime I tried to relax I'd feel like I couldn't because I didn't have that lesson ready.  I just couldn't handle the stress/anxiety anymore so I asked to be released.  I feel bad that I "failed" to have enough faith to do the job I guess.  The bishop said it was not a problem since they knew when they called me it may not be a good thing because of my chemo.  I have wrestled with the guilt I feel because I also feel great relief not to be doing it.  The new lesson format is basically not a lesson format...just have people discuss what they learned studying at home.  I am NOT comfortable up front in the first place and even more NOT comfortable in such an open/not under control fashion. I just don't have that kind of think on your feet confidence. So, if I'm bad because I asked to be released, so be it.  I just knew I couldn't go on living with all of that stress and anxiety and no relaxation at all in my life.  Just way too many things with Paul's bad health, Bean always there with his struggles, Ferf in the middle of a nasty divorce and me still trying to work and do chemo and Anna Lou and all of her needs are big issue too. (She was so nasty to us about Thanksgiving this year.)  I still don't know if the chemo has put the cancer into remission, or if I'm still going to have to have more treatments (maintenance).  I have done pretty well with them compared to a lot of people I read about on the FB page for Folicular Lymphoma that I belong to, but it still hasn't been easy and I have felt it more as it has built up.  I'm having mouth trouble now even after the last treatment.  And the bowel trouble has been a huge issue.  I am really not a fan of the idea of more chemo at this point and hope it won't be necessary.  So enough.  It has been a hard year, but also a blessed year too.  That's how it is, isn't it.  Life - the best of times, the worst of times.  I like this quote that Pres. Hinckley shared:  “Life is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride”.  I am thankful for this past year...with all of it's good and joyful things and for help getting through the hard stuff too.